NEXTDIMENSION RIG PACKS EVERYTHING BUT THE KITCHEN SINK

From lowyat.net

by Wern Shen

Friday, 05 December 2008 01:40 PM

Are you a power user who needs dual 2.5GHz quad-core Intel processors, up to 4GB of RAM, up to 1.28TB of RAID storage, a NVIDIA GeForce / Quadro FX graphics solution, and an extensive array of input / output sockets, but find yourself constantly on the road? Well fear not, because NextComputing has just the solution for you. Called the NextDimension, this peculiar looking briefcase device is all of that, and then some. It even comes with a 17-inch 1920x1200 widescreen display mounted to it's side and a snazzy leather handle on the top for easy portability. On the downside, it weighs a ton - OK, maybe just 22-pounds (circa 10kg) - and it costs a fraction more than a run of the mill desktop replacement notebook (prices start from US$6380), but hell, who ever said portable computing was all about notebooks! (Source: Engadget)

Will and Guy's - Tech Support Jokes

We have selected the best ten Tech Support Jokes. They were take by advisors at BT, HP and Dell.

1) Customer: 'My disk ran out of space when trying to save my Word document, so I changed it from double spaced to single spaced and it still wouldn't fit!'

2) Advisor: 'Press any key to continue.
Customer: I can't find the 'Any' key.

3) Great Vision
3a) Tech Support: 'Ok, in the bottom left of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?'
Customer: 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'

3b) Advisor: Can you click on 'My Computer'?
Customer: I don't have your computer, just mine.

3c) Advisor: You have Spyware on your machine which is causing the problem.
Customer: Spyware? Can they see me getting dressed through the monitor?

3d) Customer: My family in Australia use BT Softphone, I can see them but they can't see me.
Advisor: What brand is your webcam?
Customer: What's a webcam?

4) No Saving Grace
Customer: 'All my files I saved last week to my C: drive are missing!'
Tech Support: 'Do you remember what directory you first saved them in?'

Customer: 'No, I don't . I just know it was on my C: drive.'
Tech Support: 'Ok, I'll walk you through how to find the files.'

Customer: 'I wouldn't think I would be losing files on this computer. Gee, I just had the hard drive replaced in it yesterday.'

5) Tricky Install
Customer: 'Do I need a computer to use your software?'
Tech Support: 'Ok, I can help you install the software. Would you like me to do that?'
Customer: 'Yes.'

Tech Support: 'All right, can you insert the disk in the disk drive please?'
Customer: 'How?'

Tech Support: 'Place the disk in the opening at the front of the computer.'
Customer: 'Will I have to have my computer delivered before we can do this'

Tech Support: 'Um yes, that might be an idea.'

6) Customer: My iPod will only play one song.
Advisor: Which other tracks have you downloaded from iTunes?
Customer: Do I need to download tracks?

7) Tech Support: 'Have you made backups of your software and data?'
Customer: 'I didn't know it had a reverse.'

8) Customer: How do I change channel on my monitor?
Advisor: Your monitor won't have channels like a TV.
Customer: But I was watching the internet channel the other day and now I just get the word processing channel.

9) Customer: My mouse mat isn't wired up.
Advisor: I'm not sure I understand, your mouse mat shouldn't have any wires.
Customer: Well how does it know where my mouse is? Is it wireless?

Another Batch of Funny Support Calls

Give Microsoft a chance

Customer: 'I'm having trouble installing Microsoft Word.'

Tech Support: 'Tell me what You've done.'
Customer: 'I typed A:SETUP.'

Tech Support: 'Ma' am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.'
Customer: 'It says [PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk'.

Tech Support: 'Insert the MS Word setup disk.'
Customer: 'What?'

Tech Support: 'Did you buy Microsoft Word?'
Customer: 'No...'

Dial Tone

Tech Support: 'Thank you for calling. May I have your phone number beginning with area code first, please?' There was a pregnant pause, then a series of touch tones.

Tech Support: 'Hello? I need your phone number, please'. More touch tones.

Tech Support: 'Hi, can you hear me?'
Customer: 'Yes.'

Tech Support: 'Great, then can you please tell me your phone number so I can pull up your file?' More touch tones.

Tech Support: 'Sir, what's your name?'
Customer: Malcolm

Tech Support: 'Great, now can you tell me your phone number?' Touch tones again.

Tech Support: 'Please, tell me your phone number.'
Customer: 'Again?'

Tech Support: 'Yes sir, if you don't mind, but can you please just tell me verbally?' Touch tones yet again.

Tech Support: 'Sir, contrary to popular opinion, support is not half machine. I'll need you to verbally tell me your phone number with your mouth so I can bring up your account info, got it?'
Customer: 'You people are rude as well as incompetent.'

(from www.guy-sports.com)

Actual Calls to computer technical support reps:

Get the right computer - 1

Customer: I'm trying to connect to the Internet with your CD, but it just doesn't work. What am I doing wrong?

Tech support: OK, You've got the CD in the CD drive, right?
Customer: Yeah....

Tech support: And what sort of computer are you using?
Customer: Computer? Oh no, I haven't got a computer. It's in the CD player and all I get is weird noises. Listen.....

Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!!

Get the right computer - 2

Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?

Female customer: A white one...

Change of Mind

Customer: I keep getting inappropriate pop-ups on my computer and don't want my wife to think that it's me.'
Advisor: 'I will remove them for you.'

Customer: 'How do I get them back when she is not in?'

Step 1...

Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?

Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.

Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it into the computer yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....

Seeing Stars

Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

Touch and Go

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

Circular argument

Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

Local difficulty

Customer: My 14 year-old son has put a password on my computer and I can't get in.
Advisor: Has he forgotten it?
Customer: No he just won't tell me it because I've grounded him.

Language difficulty

Customer: 'How do you spell 'Internet America' ? Is there a space between 'inter' and 'net' ?'
Tech Support: 'No space between 'inter' and 'net' . It's spelled normally.'

Customer: 'Ok. A-M-E-R-I-C-K?' Tech Support: 'That's A-M-E-R-I-C-A.' Customer: 'I-C-K???'
Tech Support: 'A as in apple' Customer: 'There's no 'K' in apple!'

No comment

Customer: I met a man on the internet, can you give me his phone number?

True Computer Tech Support Calls

1) Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars. Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

2) Tech Support: 'Ok, in the bottom left of the screen, can you see the ' OK' button displayed?'
Customer: 'Wow. How can you see my screen from there?'

3) Advisor: You have Spyware on your machine which is causing the problem.
Customer: Spyware? Can they see me getting dressed through the monitor?

All i want for Christmas is a Nokia N97 ;p

Nokia unveiled the Nokia N97, the world's most advanced mobile computer, which will transform the way people connect to the Internet and to each other. Designed for the needs of Internet-savvy consumers, the Nokia N97 combines a large 3.5" touch display with a full QWERTY keyboard, providing an 'always open' window to favorite social networking sites and Internet destinations. Nokia's flagship Nseries device introduces leading technology - including multiple sensors, memory, processing power and connection speeds - for people to create a personal Internet and share their 'social location.'

"From the desktop to the laptop and now to your pocket, the Nokia N97 is the most powerful, multi-sensory mobile computer in existence," said Jonas Geust, Vice President, heading Nokia Nseries. "Together with the Ovi services announced today, the Nokia N97 mobile computer adjusts to the world around us, helping stay connected to the people and things that matter most. With the Nokia N97, Nseries leads the charge in helping to transform the Internet into your Internet".

Feature list and more pictures after the jump.

Sensing your 'So-Lo'

The Nokia N97 introduces the concept of 'social location'. With integrated A-GPS sensors and an electronic compass, the Nokia N97 mobile computer intuitively understands where it is. The Nokia N97 makes it easy to update social networks automatically with real-time information, giving approved friends the ability to update their 'status' and share their 'social location' as well as related pictures or videos.

Widescreen - Internet and entertainment

The home screen of the Nokia N97 mobile computer features the people, content and media that matter the most. Friends, social networks and news are available by simply touching the home screen. The 16:9 widescreen display can be fully personalized with frequently updated widgets of favorite web services and social networking sites. The Nokia N97 is also perfectly suited for browsing the web, streaming Flash videos or playing games. Both the physical QWERTY and virtual touch input ensure efficiency in blogging, chatting, posting, sending texts or emailing.

The Nokia N97 supports up to 48 GB of storage, including 32 GB of on-board memory, expandable with a 16 GB microSD card for music, media and more. This is complemented by excellent music capabilities, full support for the Nokia Music Store and continuous playback time of up to 1.5 days. The Nokia N97 also has a 5-Megapixel camera with high-quality Carl Zeiss optics, 16:9 and DVD quality video capture, and support for services like Share on Ovi for immediate sharing over HSDPA and WLAN.

The phone is expected to begin shipping early 2009.

originally from lowyat.net

by Vijandren Ramadass

Tuesday, 02 December 2008 05:26 PM

The HP EliteBook Isn't Just Strong, It's Army Strong

Originally from http://www.lowyat.net/v2

For the longest time, the term "business notebook" simply equated to "boring notebook". But the recent launch of HP's latest range of EliteBooks is set to change that stereotype by combining all the elements found in a business notebook with a heavy dose of pretty. Targeted at the traveling business executive who needs his notebook to survive the odd drop or two, keep his data secure at all times, and be able to confidently flaunt it in front of his clients without having to worry about hiding ugly dents and scratches, the HP EliteBook range comprises of six models from both the Professional Series (6930p, 2530p, 2730p, 8530p) and the Workstation Series (8730w, 8530w) for you to choose from. All six models come loaded to the brim with security-centric features from privacy filters that cut prevents over-the-shoulder peeping, fingerprint sensors, smart card readers, file sanitisers that permanently disposes of sensitive data, and even drive encryption software. But data isn't the only thing that the EliteBook protects, as it's military grade casing (HP DuraCase) has been certified to withstand more than an accidental knock, and the scratch-resistant surface (HP DureFinish) will ensure that the exteror remains as slick as it did the day you received it. Prices range from RM5,599 to RM8,599 and for more information, hop on over to HP's official website at www.hp.com.my.

In order to produce a local Initial D in Malaysia... Let's boleh

Storyline more or less like the Initial D... Ali found his good driving skills by helping his family business... and the Show name should be named "Inilah D!"

Takumi = Ali bin Abu Mawar (more common mah)
Bunta = Abu bin Taktau Mawar (more common also)

Good guys cars = Ali = Proton Satria GTi-FR
Abu = Proton Waja Evo 11 4WD
Bad guys cars = Perodua Kancil 660 Turbo
= Perodua Myvi TRD Version
= Perodua Kelisa 850 Turbo
= Perodua Kenari Move Custom

Location = Genting cos it's windy roads... Abu and Ali are in the business to transport Cash for the Lim Family's business... Ali have to learn all those skills to prevent Cash from flying out the windows! (the father and son are too broke to got their A/C fixed... cos the Abu keep modding the car non-stop!)

and on his way Ali learning his business, he met all those guys from all over the world going to Genting to gamble... and of course, someone who goes Genting just for race! he was inspired to be the fastest when he saw one guy flipped down the hill... breaking his record time by over 10 minutes...

in the course of his learning... he met a few people who would teach, mentor, and guide him... and giving him the experience to enjoy race rather than carry those stinky money for the Lims... the most notable opponents are the Suka Brothers...

The elder brother called Ryo Suka (Ryosuke) who drives a bus to carry tourists to Genting... and the younger brother Kei Suka (Keisuke) drives a B14 Nissan Sentra SE-R taxi and also carry tourists to Genting on a daily basis... both of the brothers got great skill from travelling the windy road everyday, both way, no matter up hill or downhill...

but somehow Ali managed to beat both of them because:

1. Kei Suka lost to Ali first because he was carrying 2 fat dudes increasing the car weight by 180kg... however, Kei Suka was able to keep leading the race by having 200c.c. more displacement than Ali's GTi... and also, the extra weight made Kei Suka a little bit faster like 2km/h in cornering speed... But the lead didn't last long enough until Ali determined to use his best skill learned from his experience... he immediately dropped into longkang and flipped straight to the finish line...

2. Ryo Suka had no chance to lose as his bus is having 12,000c.c. and a Top Rahsia quad turbo kit... Generating 1 megawatts (1470bhp), Ryo Suka was able to keep the lead... but somehow, Ryo Suka lost to Ali because some little girls were screaming like being rape when Ryo Suka stepped on the gas pedal of his bus... Ryo Suka managed to ignore those little girls... but he somehow lost concentration when those male passengers starting to scream like gay dude having fun he pushed real hard... he lost concentration and drove to the wrong way to finish point...

Both of the brothers later on found a racing team named Projek tak jaDi... Ryo Suka is being the team manager cum mentor cum chief tyres changer... Ali and Kei Suka wanted to give the top driver position to Ryo Suka, but he declined because his bus is having 10 tyres... racing for one race would cost them more than RM10k just for replacing tyres... so Ali and Kei Suka would be the top racers of the team by using their well known Sentra SE-R and also Ali's Satria GTi... until Ryo Suka found a bus with less tyres... and yep that would be a crazy mini bus...

after they've found the racing team... they planned to go everywhere in Malaysia to challenge the top drivers in Malaysia... and they're well equiped with all kind of equipments in Ryo Suka's bus and hell lot of tyres... also, Ryo Suka hired a few mechanics just to make the team look pro!

and that's all for Stage 1... stay tuned to Stage 2 when the team reach KL (they're still on their way right now don't know when they're gonna reach... but don't worry, they'll call and update me for sure)... there they would meet Team Matahari Merah, Team Alibaba Bintang Laju, Team Agung, and much more!!!

(c) Copyrighted 2008 - jaRv1s from www.drift.com.my